This article is a simple method for getting to know yourself because the likelihood is that you don’t know yourself very well. You are unaware of your darkest aspects, despite the fact that you intuitively recognize their existence. You avoid knowing yourself because the prospect is simply too unpleasant. When confronted directly with yourself, you withdraw.
You withdraw by playing on your phone, eating something, turning on the stereo or television, falling asleep, or finding another way to divert your attention.
Consider this: After 30 minutes of conversation with someone, you would have a good idea of what they were all about. You’d be aware of their flaws and the reasons their lives are less than ideal.
However, you’re stumped as to why your own life isn’t going as planned.
Isn’t it fascinating that you can have a more complete understanding of someone you barely know than you do of yourself?
Follow this procedure and you will gain an intimate knowledge of yourself:
- Each day, spend some time alone with yourself. This can be a 20-minute period at the end of the day after everyone else has gone to bed, or you can go off on your own. However, you must be truly alone.
- Keep distractions to a minimum during this time. No books, electronic devices, or other amusing items. It’s just the two of you. The ideal situation is to be seated in a chair facing a blank wall. You are now left with nothing to do but converse with yourself.
- Engage in dialogue. How do you address yourself? Conversely, say the same things you would to another person you’re attempting to meet. You are capable of accomplishing this. Pose and answer questions to yourself.
How do you make a living? How do you feel about it? Are you sure you don’t like it? Why are you there?
What is most critical to you? Why?
What are you fearful of? Why?
What are your advantages and disadvantages?
Discuss your childhood experiences – the good, the bad, and the ugly.
And so forth
- Be exhaustive. Consider the difficult questions. Retrace your steps throughout your life. Consider your youth. Consider the traumatic experiences you’ve endured and how they’ve impacted you. What would you tell yourself if you had the opportunity to travel back in time?
Consider your future goals. What are the current difficulties in your life? What are you supposed to be doing? Confront yourself with the things that make you cringe.
- Persevere. At some point, you’re likely to think to yourself, “This is ridiculous.” I’m squandering my time and have more important things to do.” This is simply you acting like a chicken. This is analogous to turning on the television or playing with your phone. It is evasion.
- Develop a practice of meditation. Along with having intimate conversations with yourself, learn to meditate and incorporate it into your daily life. The truth will eventually surface.
Avoid passing judgment on your thoughts. Simply be aware of them and accept them.
Few of us have examined our lives or ourselves. We can look at others and accurately identify their flaws, even if we barely know them. Yet we are blind to the things that others see in us. We’d rather be distracted than confronted with the truth.
If you are unwilling to take the critical step of getting to know yourself, you will continue to struggle in the same ways you have struggled your entire life. Once you do, you’ll be on your way to creating a more meaningful and satisfying life.